Heather was wonderful: smart and heartfelt, the other two not so much. One of the authors - who I'll not mention for fear of being unnecessarily mean - represented for me just why I run far away from a good chunk of these damn writer's reading things. I'll explain: these are some of the words that came up whilst he was spewing his wickedly droll mind-numbing disharmony:
separation, monarch, population, regionalism, national status, cabinet, Winnipeg, our troops at home, Federal, Quebec & Ottawa. Out of this world smarmy, funny-eye-brow action, like, all-too-eager, here I go, I've got something absolutely positively electric to share mouth dropping way wide open (me) prize winning idiocy. What's worse is how deliriously smug he was whilst spreading the drabness, the seniors-in-underpant contingent gobbled it up, though to be fair, they're the ones who've season tickets to this Harbourfront dosefest, so they just show up no matter what's happening, cuz it gives them a break from going to the bathroom and sleeping and playing bridge at home. My mind couldn't help but wander, moseying on over to terribly important things I could have been getting done at the old headquarters, for instance, there's this absurdly dirty laundry bag that needs a good rinse, I could be at work on that, or the TV, that needs a good Windex wipe down. But seriously, dull, dull, dull.
Now Miss O'Neill.
One of the things that make a creative and classy writer is the ability to improvise, ultimately following their passion. She got up there, chose not to read from her novel, the one that Harper Collins was promoting, probably the reason she was there at Harbourfront in the first place, but she pulls out of her little literary trick bag an enchanting bright story that she performed a while back on This American Life and The Wire.
Way to go Heather.
We got to talking a bit, odd though, she seemed a little creeped-out by my bi-polar manic approach and my first line,
"Hey there, tell me, does this juice box taste funny to you?" I thought it was a pretty decent opening line. My witty banter may also have something to do with the reason I am a single gentleman.
